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(Un)SafeNest: "Instead of hope and healing, we encountered violence and hurt."

Darcy Spears speaks to domestic violence survivors who summoned the courage to share their struggles in finding help and support
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(Un)SafeNest: Lauren, MJ, and April's stories

LAS VEGAS (KTNV) — Finding the courage to escape domestic abuse can be a matter of life and death.

Last year alone, on average, there was a domestic violence death nearly every 11 days in Metro's jurisdiction.

The department recently honored thirty-four victims who lost their lives to domestic violence by reading their names in a tree dedication ceremony.

In this story, we honor those who lived, giving them a platform to share their stories and their common experience at SafeNest.

SafeNest is a misnomer according to more than a dozen women who sought shelter with Nevada's largest domestic violence organization.

Instead of help, hope and healing, they encountered crime, violence and hurt.

LAUREN'S STORY

(Un)SafeNest: Lauren's Story

"Women like us need help. We need stability. We need support. We need direction. We need for people to understand that what we're going through is serious!"

Lauren says she knows she stayed with her abusive husband too long, enduring "years of battery, of abuse mentally, physically, emotionally."

Police reports and court cases don't begin to paint the picture of what she went through.

"Broken ribs, boiling hot water poured on me, black eyes, having to hide to go to work, putting a patch over my eye because my whole face is black."

She has two sons: a four-year-old with autism and a 15-year-old high school student.

When the abuse extended to her children, she found the strength to leave, seeking shelter at SafeNest.

"When we first moved into SafeNest, we were put into the coffee room, which actually does not have beds. We were sleeping on a couch."

She says the hardest thing for her was bringing her children into that situation.

"I had no choice. I don't have anybody."

But instead of being a transition to recovery, Lauren says SafeNest "was a major setback."

Lauren says she didn't get the help she was counting on with counseling or housing and was kicked out of SafeNest for violating policy by taking pictures--which she says she did to document conditions inside the shelter.

Having nowhere to go and no transportation, she had to leave some belongings behind, but when she returned to SafeNest to get them, "One of the bags was missing. This bag had all of my clothes in it, my sons' clothes, my mother's ashes from her cremation."

Things that take on tremendous value for a family that has so little.

"I don't have anything to my name anymore. All I've done is try to get away from this man who was hurting me so bad."

It's hard to hear stories like Lauren's, but we all need to listen.

I cried with her when she shared her pain, but I'm happy to report that she's now in a better place. She got a job in the healthcare field and found a stable place for herself and her sons.

MJ'S STORY

(Un)SafeNest: MJ's Story

Mary Juliann, who goes by MJ, has had a series of abusive relationships.

"It's been sort of a constant thing my entire life."

In a way, it's all she knows.

"I've been strangled, I've been put in the hospital, head split open, you name it, I've had it. Never really talked to anyone about it. Kind of kept it quiet."

But late last year, she broke the cycle of violence.

"I have my little girl to think about, and I just... I needed help!"

MJ and her daughter sought shelter at SafeNest but said they found neither help nor hope there. They left in June of this year.

"I tell her, don't ever follow in mamma's footsteps."

MJ is speaking out now for those still living in the shelter, still living in fear.

"I'm scared! Very scared." But she says she decided to speak out, "To help women and make sure they never have to go through the kind of things I went through."

For herself, she says she only wants peace of mind.

After leaving SafeNest, MJ had to fight to get her daughter back, which she recently did after securing a job and finding stable housing.

APRIL'S STORY

(Un)SafeNest: April's Story

From a car crash that left her with a traumatic brain injury to sexual exploitation, April has known a life of struggle.

She fled years of abuse in the spring of this year, seeking shelter at SafeNest.

"I went there to escape my trafficking situation and try to heal and regroup and get my life back on track."

She thought she'd get help finding a path to a better future but says she found chaos instead.

In a text to her caseworker on June 4, she wrote, "When I came to SafeNest, I thought I was going to gain stability and support. I'm disappointed because instead, I feel hurt and misguided."

"SafeNest has not helped me at all," April said. "They actually destroyed my spirit and my will to move forward from my abuse situation."

While at the shelter, April says her safety and health were under constant threat.

"A woman, she, uh, tampered with my hygiene products... put feces, urine, spit and menstrual blood on my bed, my blankets, my sheets, my clothing, and terrorized me! Threw feces on the wall! I told staff. Staff said there was nothing they could do. I asked them if they'd assist me, they said no, I had to clean it myself."

That night, she checked herself into a hospital. But she soon had to return to the shelter because she had nowhere else to go.

As with the other women whose stories we've shared throughout Domestic Violence Awareness Month, April sought comfort in coming forward and speaking out.

13 Investigates

Watch (Un)SafeNest

Darcy Spears


If you or someone you know needs help, here's a list of domestic violence resources: